First, you must concentrate
Esther Nagle is teaching me to breathe by Skype. If you breathe properly, filling your lungs from the belly to the throat, it will improve everything: skin, sleep, digestion, even impending Christmas stress. First, you must concentrate. Its not meditation that has a precise meaning. We call it quiet sitting. Right. I should be able to sit quietly.
Sit up straight. Clasp your hands, right hand dominant, thumbs touching, put them in your lap. Dont change the way youre breathing, just focus on it. Is it through your mouth or nose? Deep or shallow? Really think about whats happening. I can breathe, but I cant think about breathing. I am thinking about revenge. When your mind wanders, bring it back gently. How could she see my mind wandering, over Skype, with my eyes closed? No recriminations. Dont judge yourself.
In fact, Im judging the man who cycled into my dog, not an hour ago, then floated his intent to call the police. You hurt a dog, playing in a park, and you want to call the police?
It is ze English law ze dog must be under control. Pollution mask. Cycling 20 miles an hour through a park. Hates dogs. Obsessed with authority. Plainly, I had slipped into a Ukip anxiety dream.
Well start with sukha pranayama, easy breathing. Yup, sorry, right, I can breathe, I can do this. Start with three long breaths, taking four seconds to inhale, four to exhale. If you can manage it, well move to six seconds. But dont do it if its too hard. Ive hurt my lungs before trying too hard. How do you hurt a lung? I was experimenting with different ratios of breath. We go to six seconds. It is no longer easy.
We move on to vibhagha pranayama, lobular breathing, where you segment your lungs into upper breathing, mid-chest breathing and abdominal breathing, then work one at a time. To breathe into your abdomen, place your hands flat, just below your ribcage, with your middle fingers touching. Do a six-second breath to separate those fingers, then exhale to bring them back together. Then place your hands on your side aim for the feeling of your ribcage opening like an accordion then flat against your spine. Repeat this for mid-chest hands on your boobs and upper chest, hands just below the hollow of your throat, then at corresponding heights at the side and the back. By the end, youve had 54 seconds of quality breath.
How are you feeling about the cyclist?
Much better. I no longer want vengeance. I merely want the world to know that a bad man exists and he has a bike.
How do you usually cope with stress?
I sublimate, then drink through.
Breathing is brilliant for addiction recovery.
Wait, what? I dont want to recover!
She smiles. And breathe.
This week I learned
If youre breathing deeply, dont hold your breath.
Read more: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/nov/25/fit-in-40s-breathe-properly-zoe-williams
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